As We Forgive
Matthew 6:12, 14-15
“And forgive us our debts, As we forgive our debtors. … For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” (Matthew 6:12, 14-15)
Last time, we began to look at the topic of forgiveness in Matthew 6:12. The context, of course, is the Lord’s Prayer in which Jesus taught His disciples to pray. We are to daily ask our Heavenly Father to “forgive us our debts, As we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12).
This request comes in the second half of the prayer after we have prayed for God’s name to be hallowed, His kingdom to come, and His will to be done on earth as it is in heaven. In this part of the prayer, we are petitioning God to meet our needs—needs for daily provision, pardon from sins, and protection from temptation and evil.
1. Prayer For Forgiveness
In this petition, we saw that forgiveness is the issue—it is our deep human need. We saw that our sins, our transgressions, are debts that we owe to God. They are a failure to honor and love God and others. It is a debt that we have not paid and could never pay. So, we need to be forgiven.
And we saw that forgiveness has two aspects: 1) removal of guilt; 2) restoration of fellowship[1].
Remember, this prayer is only for true children of God who have been saved by faith in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. When we were saved, redeemed by the blood of Jesus, all our sins were forgiven. We were justified with God. All our sins were accounted to Christ and His righteousness was accounted to us (2 Cor. 5:21). The guilt for our sins was removed forever by Christ. We stand in Christ forgiven.
Yet, we still sin. And when we do, it hinders our fellowship with our heavenly Father. A believer’s sin does not break the relationship we have with our heavenly Father through Christ, but it does strain that relationship. It hampers it. Sin harms the fellowship we enjoy with God. So we need forgiveness to restore close fellowship with God.
In John 13 Jesus is with His disciples on the night He will be betrayed, the evening before He will die on the cross. John records that
3 Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come from God and was going to God, 4 rose from supper and laid aside His garments, took a towel and girded Himself. 5 After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet, and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded. 6 Then He came to Simon Peter. And Peter said to Him, “Lord, are You washing my feet?” 7 Jesus answered and said to him, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but you will know after this.” 8 Peter said to Him, “You shall never wash my feet!” Jesus answered him, “If I do not wash you, you have no part with Me.” 9 Simon Peter said to Him, “Lord, not my feet only, but also my hands and my head!” 10 Jesus said to him, “He who is bathed needs only to wash his feet, but is completely clean; and you are clean, but not all of you.” (John 13:3-10).
Jesus’ reply to Peter explains precisely what is happening as we pray this fifth petition. “ He who is bathed needs only to wash his feet, but is completely clean” (John 13:5-11). The bathing speaks of the judicial kind of forgiveness, the removal of the guilt for our sin. But the washing of the feet refers to the defilement that the kingdom citizen gets as he walks through this life. From this, he needs daily washing so that his fellowship is restored and his joy is undiminished.
So, the first part of this prayer is a prayer for forgiveness; the second is a:
2. Prayer For a Forgiving Spirit
Why does Jesus say that we should pray to be forgiven as we forgive others? It seems as if Jesus is saying, “The way you forgive other people is the way God will forgive you.” Ray Pritchard[2] points out that on one level that thought is puzzling; on another, it is profoundly disturbing; on still another level it appears to present a major theological difficulty. Augustine called this text “a terrible petition” pointing out that if you pray these words while harboring an unforgiving spirit, you are actually asking God not to forgive you. Charles Haddon Spurgeon, the great English preacher, said that if you pray the Lord’s Prayer with an unforgiving spirit, you have virtually signed your own “death warrant.”[3]
When Jesus teaches us to pray “And forgive us our debts, As we forgive our debtors,” It cannot mean that forgiving others is a work by which we earn God’s forgiveness. As we saw last time, the gospel proclaims that Christ has already paid the debt with His blood for our forgiveness. We cannot earn it by any act or obtain it by any forgiveness that we offer others. Rather, as children of God, our forgiveness flows from a heart satisfied with the mercy of God and rejoicing in the cancellation of our sin debt (Matthew 18:24).
John Stott comments, “This certainly does not mean that our forgiveness of others earns us the right to be forgiven. It is rather that God forgives only the penitent and that one of the chief evidences of true penitence is a forgiving spirit.”[4]
So what does it mean to pray “And forgive us our debts, As we forgive our debtors”?
Notice the conjunction that connects the first half of the petition with the second half. It is the little word “As”. Everything hangs on the meaning of that word. Lenski comments, that the “as” (ὡς) is not causal; it does not state the reason why God should treat us likewise but the necessary prerequisite without which no believer would dare to appear before God to ask for forgiveness.[1]
The New Testament is clear that there is a real connection between how we forgive others and how we receive forgiveness from God. It teaches us that we,
A. Forgive Because We Are Forgiven
When we understand how much God has forgiven us, we are set free to forgive others. Sometimes we excuse our lack of forgiveness on the grounds that the one who has wronged us does not deserve our forgiveness. But the truth is: No one ever wronged you as much as you have wronged God. You did not deserve God’s forgiveness. He gave it freely to you by grace because of the sacrificial death of His Son.
In Matthew 18:23-35, Jesus told the parable of Unforgiving Servant to explain this point. He tells the parable in response to Peter who asked Jesus, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” (Matt. 18:21). Jesus said to Peter, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” (Matt. 18:22). Then Jesus illustrates forgiveness with the parable:
23 Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. 25 But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made. 26 The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, “Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.” 27 Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. 28 But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, “Pay me what you owe!” 29 So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, “Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.” 30 And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. 31 So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done. 32 Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, “You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. 33 Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?” 34 And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. 35 So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.
The point of the parable is that those who are forgiven must forgive. After being forgiven a massively unpayable debt, how could the servant be so mean and cruel to others? The servant had been forgiven a great debt, and so he should have forgiven the debt of the other servant. The servant was forgiven first, so he should forgive.
This is how forgiveness is passed on. Forgiveness always begins with God. It never begins with us. Having been forgiven our unpayable debt to God, by the grace of God we are then able to forgive others their debts to us. Indeed, our ability to forgive is one of the surest signs of our having been forgiven. “There is no forgiveness for the one who does not forgive,” writes Don Carson. “How could it be otherwise? His unforgiving spirit bears strong witness to the fact that he has never repented.”[5]
When God’s grace comes into our hearts it makes us forgiving. We demonstrate whether we have been forgiven by whether or not we will forgive. The bottom line is, if someone finally refuses to forgive, there can be only one reason, that is, that he has never received the grace of Christ.
The Bible also teaches that we,
B. Forgive Just as We Are Forgiven
Ephesians 4:32 says, “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you.” How did God forgive us? Unconditionally because of what Christ did for us. He forgave us freely. C. S. Lewis writes,
No part of His teaching is clearer: And there are no exceptions to it. He doesn’t say that we are to forgive other people’s sins providing they are not too frightful, or providing there are extenuating circumstances, or anything of that sort. We are to forgive them all, however spiteful, however mean, however often they are repeated. If we don’t, we shall be forgiven none of our own.[6]
The Greek term for “forgiveness” (aphiemi) comes from a word that means “to let go.” Forgiveness is a release, a letting go of self-destructive feelings like anger, bitterness, and revenge. Phil Newton writes,
If you are having trouble forgiving someone that has wronged you, then meditate on the cross; meditate on your own forgiveness. God has not forgiven you because you deserved it any more than He commands you to forgive someone else because he deserves it. Just as you have been met by grace, even so show the grace of forgiveness to others.[7]
This is how God forgave us in Christ. This is how we are to forgive.
Finally Jesus is teaching that we,
C. Forgive That We Might Be Forgiven
Does Jesus really teach that God’s forgiveness of us is somehow linked to our forgiveness of others? Yes. In fact, Jesus clearly emphasizes this point. Notice that the only part of the Lord’s Prayer that Jesus singles out for additional teaching here is this fifth petition.
Matthew records Jesus’ commentary in Matthew 6:14-15: “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Jesus states this principle in the positive, “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you,” (Matt. 6:14) and in the negative, “But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matt. 6:15). Jesus could not be clearer. Unless you forgive you will not be forgiven. This is a hard word, isn’t it? But it is a hard word of grace. When we were saved God forgave all our sins in Christ. We have been declared righteous on account of Jesus Christ taking our sin debt in full. Our guilt has been removed; we are forgiven.
But if we want to experience the daily sense of forgiveness in our walk with the Lord, we must ask for forgiveness when we sin and forgive those who have wronged us. When I forgive, I set the prisoner free, and I discover that the prisoner I set free is me. Jesus stresses that only those who grant forgiveness will receive it.
Pritchard writes that when you are unforgiving “you have chosen to hang on to your bitterness and to forfeit your daily walk with the Lord. You would rather be angry than joyful. You have chosen resentment over peace. Your grudges have become more important to you than the daily blessing of God.”[8]
Someone has said it this way, “Resentment is like drinking deadly poison and praying for the other guy to die.” Unforgiveness produces bitterness, becoming an infectious cancer of the heart, it begins to chew up and eat up your whole life.
In this life, we will never be free of sin. Therefore, we must daily repent of wrong thoughts and actions that offend God and others. By doing this, we maintain and increase our spiritual health and life. But also, because we live in a world full of sin, we will often get hurt by others and, in response, we need to practice forgiveness. When we do this, we keep the blessing of God’s forgiveness in our lives.
Remember how much you have been forgiven in Christ. Then forgive everyone who has wronged you. We are never more like the Son of God than when we choose to forgive.
J I Packer quotes this hymn by Rosamond Herklots:[9]
Forgive our sins as we forgive,
You taught us, Lord, to pray,
but You alone can grant us grace
To live the words we say.
How can your pardon reach and bless
the unforgiving heart?
that broods on wrong, and will not let
old bitterness depart?
In blazing light Your cross reveals
the truth we dimly knew,
how small the debts men owe to us,
how great our debt to you.
Lord, cleanse the depths within our souls,
and bid resentment cease;
then, reconciled to God and man,
our lives will spread Your peace.[10]
May that be true of us today.
Forgiveness is about releasing. It is about my releasing my sins into the hands of God’s grace so that I can experience His forgiveness. It is about releasing the debts others incur against me so that my fellowship is not hindered with God or with man.
Are there debts in your life that need to be canceled today? If so, bring them to the Father in prayer. He will forgive them because of the redemption provided through the death of His Son Jesus Christ. Are there debts that need to be cleared up with others? If so, forgive them. Make it right, whatever it takes so that your fellowship with the Lord can be restored.
[1] R. C. H. Lenski, The Interpretation of St. Matthew’s Gospel (Minneapolis, MN: Augsburg Publishing House, 1961), 270.
[1] Phil Newton, The Lord’s Prayer: Forgiveness, https://archive.southwoodsbc.org/sermons/matthew_06.12,14-15.php
[2] Ray Pritchard, Forgiveness and the Lord’s Prayer, https://www.keepbelieving.com/sermon/forgiveness-and-the-lords-prayer/
[3] Charles Spurgeon, quoted by Ray Pritchard, Unless You Forgive, https://www.keepbelieving.com/sermon/unless-you-forgive/
[4] John R. W. Stott and John R. W. Stott, The Message of the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7): Christian Counter-Culture, The Bible Speaks Today (Leicester; Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1985), 149.
[5] Don Carson, The Sermon on the Mount, p. 69. Quoted by Phil Newton, The Lord’s Prayer: Forgiveness, https://archive.southwoodsbc.org/sermons/matthew_06.12,14-15.php
[6] C.S. Lewis, Fern-Seeds and Elephants, pp. 39-49. Quoted by Ray Pritchard, Unless You Forgive, https://www.keepbelieving.com/sermon/unless-you-forgive/
[7] Newton, ibid.
[8] Ray Pritchard, Unless You Forgive, https://www.keepbelieving.com/sermon/unless-you-forgive/
[9] J I Packer, I Want To Be A Christian, 164. Quoted by Smith, ibid.
[10] Rosamond Herklots, Forgive Our Sins As We Forgive, 1969 Oxford University Press. https://hymnary.org/text/forgive_our_sins_as_we_forgive
